Of course, there’s no “one fingering trick finishes all” technique. But there are some interesting insights from the study that can help steer you in the right direction. Here’s what thousands of women had to say about the precious art of fingering.
1. It’s More Than Sticking Your Finger In And Out
It’s not what you put in, it’s what’s on the outside that counts. Specifically, we’re talking about the clit. One point echoed throughout the study was that the kind of “fingering” that actually brings women to orgasm is rubbing of the outside area around the clit. In fact, that’s how most women masturbate, because it’s what actually feels the best. For the vast majority of women, penetration is nice, but it’s kind of like rubbing your balls: Pleasant, but not going to make you come.
2. Different Women Like Different Things
There’s no “one move fits all” technique that’s going to do the trick — and anyone who tells you differently is lying. The women who participated in this study went as far as to say that the guys who think they have “the move” are usually worst at giving pleasure. The mentality of “one move to finish them all” makes sense to men, since moves like stroking and sucking work for almost all guys — and if there’s lube, just about any rubbing is going to feel good to some degree. But for women, it’s truly different strokes for different folks. The clit is so sensitive that some strokes can feel really uncomfortable or even hurt certain women. Meaning, if some move felt really good for your ex-girlfriend, that doesn’t mean it’ll do the trick for your next girlfriend.
3. Most Agree That ‘This One Move’ Doesn’t Do It
Porn that shows women getting rubbed out typically portrays a hard and fast back and forth motion — aka the “DJ” move. According to the OMGYes study, that kind of super fast cadence and pressure directly on the clit only feels good for 1 in 48 women. For the rest, it either doesn’t feel great or actually hurts. To put it into perspective, imagine someone taking your dick and rubbing the tip really hard with their palm as fast as they can. It’s a sharp painful tickle, and you want it to stop. For the vast majority of women, it’s not a good move — even if women in porn are pretending to like it.
4. Fingering Isn’t Just For Foreplay
It’s a true fact that very few women get off by way of penetration alone. In the study conducted by OMGYes, 72% of women said they need their clit stimulated during intercourse in order to reach orgasm. Meaning, lending a helping hand to your partner’s most sensitive part during intercourse is going to lead to more orgasms. In fact, the resounding sentiment from the study was that the clit gets attention paid to here and there, but most women would prefer to have it touched throughout the act.
5. Be A Tease
Approach the crotch area, but keep passing around it — as if it doesn’t exist. One woman from the study likened this tactic to playing with a cat. If you reach right for it, it runs away. If you tease and don’t stroke it — it comes to you.
Another woman described a method she calls the “fake-out.” To do it, you move your fingertip down your partner’s body from her neck to her breasts to her stomach — but instead of landing at her crotch, veer down her leg. Then, on the way back up, move your fingertip in another path that misses her crotch too. These moves build anticipation and help awaken arousal. Many women love this kind of withholding, and will eventually move their crotch toward your finger or tongue as it passes by — a good sign that the clit is ready to be touched. The more awake her body is, the more pleasurable it will be when you finally touch her.
6. Use The Hood
The clit wears a naturally occurring hoodie of skin, which helps soften contact since the clit is super sensitive. Staying right on the clit is often pretty painful — to paint a picture, one woman from the study described the sensation as “the feeling of sticking a q-tip way too far into your ear.” Not a good feeling. To balance this, most women say that “layering” with the hood brings them the right amount of pleasure without the pain that direct contact with the clit can end up facilitating. To try layering, touch the hood, rubbing it so that the pressure you’re putting on the hood makes contact with the clit.